Updated: Jul 21, 2020
Written April 6, 2020.
On March 20, we recorded and published a special bonus episode of The Q-Chat entitled, Geaux Strong thru the Coronavirus. At the time of the recording my anxiety was at an all time high. I know I had seen so many of my friends posting on our favorite social media platforms about their struggles with anxiety and simply not being ok. Due to this heartbreaking time of uncertainty, I felt it was important to devote an episode in it’s entirety to how we were all feeling and struggling through this pandemic ordeal.
When I recorded the episode, I mentioned several things that had triggered my stress. Having a respiratory condition of asthma had already caused me additional fear in how to prevent contracting this potentially deadly virus. I also mentioned the fear I had for my elderly parents. At the time, little did I know that a week later I would be under the fear of dealing with my elderly mother fighting the virus.
Needless to say, this ordeal has been one of the worst experiences of my life on so many levels. I was faced with the possible fear of losing a parent and the helplessness of this virus. I also experienced the stifling pain of struggling with my toxic family dynamic and coming to the stark realization of how hurtful and insensitive people can be in trying times. I've seen a lot of people mention that during this virus, we'll see the true colors of the people in our lives. I've heard many people say that those who haven't checked on us during this time never cared at all. I'd have to agree that it's definitely something to consider. My mom and I were always very close. She and I spoke on the phone almost every day. I was in an awful position not being able to go to her home in New Orleans. Not being able to help and having my suggestions regarding her medical care be disregarded was hurtful in a deep way that I can't even articulate. This virus has put us all in a tremendous state of fear and panic. When the fear of the virus began to get closer and closer in proximity, none of us expected it to get so close to us. I've had three friends lose parents to this virus within 5 days. The swiftness and stealth nature of this virus is heartbreaking and cruel. Over the past few days during this ordeal, I struggled with several levels of sadness: The heavy weight of not knowing if my mother would survive this virus, feeling helpless and living with the reminder that I have always been the "nonessential" family member unworthy of respect, and receiving little to no information at times regarding my mother from the individual entrusted with her care. These were extra daggers in my heart outside of the paranoia involved in not contracting the virus that has made the past few days of dealing with this pandemic the worst.
So why am I sharing all of this? I want us all to hold on and do our best to be whole and Geaux Strong IN SPITE OF this virus. A lot of us are struggling with the anxiety of how to prevent contracting this virus, seeing death in such a huge magnitude, and carrying the weight of worrying about our family and friends while seeing what place we really stood in some people's lives. In spite of all this, we can still Geaux Strong through this virus. If anything, I've learned that life is fragile. It's unapologetic, moves faster than anything and waits for no one. What are you planning to do to honor and value the life you have? Will you remain in toxic situations once this is over? Will you take the same people for granted or continue to entertain those who took you for granted? Will you still wait "until the time is right" to follow your dreams and pursue the goals brewing in your heart? As I sit here today looking over the past few weeks, I know that I'm ready to seek greater and never look back. Greater connections, greater minds, greater conversations, greater dreams and greater love. We all no longer have time to waste. Life is fragile and for me, this pandemic has been a lesson on the amount of time I've wasted on people and fruitless things. Use this time to Geaux Love Ya'Self! Why? Because there is no better time to reflect on how important you truly are. You are greater than those who don't see the value you offer. You can Geaux Strong through this virus. Find a reason to smile. Find a reason to get up out of bed every morning with a heart filled with joy and gratitude. Find a reason to hold those that sing to your heart closer and let geaux of those who don't see your light--no matter who they are. This is a scary time but our faith can be bigger than our fears. Geaux Strong, stay safe and Geaux Love Ya'Self! We're all going to make it through this ordeal together. In case no one has told you today, I love you. You're special and I'll see you all on the other side. 💜
Janicefer RoseMonday, April 6, 2020 Proud of the strength and peace you have blessings ️
Alesia Monday, April 6, 2020 This is amazing. I m so sorry you are geuxing through this but you have a great support system in friends- we will be your family to lift you up when down. Love you girl
Candis Netter Tuesday, April 7, 2020 This post touched on so many issues I'm sure others are dealing with. Anxiety, fear, uncertainty, loss of control, and family trauma to name a few. It took heart to put this out there.
Yolanda J Wednesday, April 22, 2020 Life is fragile and must be celebrated and revered. The anxiety of the new normal is beyond stressful but we are still here. I enjoyed this message